BREAKING STERN NEWS! A Kaneda Exclusive!

Kaneda's Pinball Podcast (Patreon feed)·podcast_episode·8m 35s·analyzed·Feb 11, 2024

Analysis

claude-haiku-4-5-20251001 · $0.025

TL;DR

Kaneda reports Stern is developing new Metallica on Spike 3 hardware as next major release.

Summary

Kaneda reports an exclusive rumor from a trusted source that Stern Pinball is transitioning from Spike 2 to Spike 3 hardware and plans to release a brand-new Metallica pinball machine with entirely original design, layout, code, and animations—not a remake of the classic John Borg/Lyman Sheets/Dirty Donnie original. The new Metallica is speculated to be Stern's next or near-next release, likely featuring illustrated artwork similar to Guns N' Roses. Kaneda also briefly discusses American Pinball bringing a new title to Texas Pinball Festival and criticizes the declining viewership of the Twippies awards.

Key Claims

Stern Pinball is transitioning from Spike 2 to Spike 3 hardware with better LCD imagery and more computing power
medium confidence · Kaneda, citing one of his best sources who 'has never been wrong', delivers as a rumor but treats as imminent
A brand-new Metallica pinball machine is coming with entirely new design, layout, code, and animations—not a remake
medium confidence · Kaneda's exclusive rumor source; Kaneda speculates it could be the next or title-after-next release
Stern typically releases one music-themed pinball machine per year
medium confidence · Kaneda's industry observation used to contextualize Metallica timing
Approximately 5,000-6,000 original Metallica machines are in circulation worldwide
low confidence · Kaneda's estimate; not independently verified
The Metallica illustrated artwork by Dirty Donnie helped establish that illustrated artwork drives success for Stern
medium confidence · Kaneda's analysis comparing Metallica's success to other illustrated art games like Guns N' Roses
American Pinball might be bringing its next title to Texas Pinball Festival
medium confidence · Jason Knapp Arcade reported this; Kaneda notes it's been a year since Galactic Arcade Tank Force underperformed
Jaws Pinball and Elton John are not selling as well as expected
low confidence · Kaneda's observation on current Stern releases; subjective assessment of sales performance

Notable Quotes

“This is not a remake of the old Metallica game by John Borg and Dirty Donny and Lyman Sheets. This is going to be a brand new spanking Metallica machine with an all new design, an all new layout, all new code, all new animations, all new this, all new that.”
Kaneda @ ~4:45 — Core exclusive claim about the new Metallica being a complete redesign, not a remaster or update
“I have from one of my best sources in all of pinball. This guy's never been wrong. He is telling me the following. I'm gonna deliver it as a rumor, but man, this sounds like it's gonna happen.”
Kaneda @ ~4:00 — Kaneda establishes credibility of his source while acknowledging rumor status
“Stern Pinball needs this, right? They don't have enough power to like light up their games with modern lighting. I think that's one of the reasons why we're not seeing a lot of innovation.”
Kaneda @ ~4:30 — Kaneda explains the rationale for Spike 3 transition as addressing hardware limitations
“In a world in which we want original stuff we haven't seen before to go back to an older theme we already had. And not just that we have a great version of a Metallica pinball machine that is one of Stern's best games ever.”
Kaneda @ ~7:00 — Kaneda expresses skepticism about a new Metallica when the original is already acclaimed
“Stern Pinball is gonna have the most difficult time with the size of the company. They need to make sure every launch they come out with has like thousands of people ready to absorb all of these games.”
Kaneda @ ~8:30 — Analysis of Stern's market challenges and saturation concerns
“It's been a year since Galactic Arcade Tank Force tanked. Nobody ordering that game and we all know they gonna Christian Marche into Texas with their Barry O Food Truck Barbecue-inspired dead-on-arrival game.”
Kaneda @ ~2:30 — Kaneda's critical assessment of American Pinball's commercial performance and upcoming title

Entities

KanedapersonStern PinballcompanyJohn Borgperson Dirty DonniepersonLyman SheetspersonMetallicagame American Pinballcompany Jason Knapp

Signals

?
machine_intel: Brand-new Metallica pinball machine with completely original design, layout, code, and animations coming from Stern Pinball on Spike 3 hardware
medium · Kaneda cites unnamed trusted source 'who's never been wrong' but frames as rumor; specific details about new design vs. remake suggest insider knowledge
?
technology_signal: Stern Pinball is transitioning from Spike 2 to Spike 3 platform with improved LCD imagery and increased computing power to enable modern lighting innovations
medium · Kaneda's source reported this as imminent; Kaneda contextualizes as addressing current hardware limitations preventing innovation
?
product_strategy: New Metallica is speculated to be Stern's next major release or the one after next; Stern typically releases one music-themed machine per year
low · Kaneda's speculation based on pattern recognition; no official confirmation
$
market_signal: Recent Stern releases Jaws and Elton John are underperforming sales expectations; Stern facing market saturation challenges
low · Kaneda's subjective observation: 'It's not selling very well' for Elton John; Jaws question about continued sales
?
design_philosophy: Illustrated artwork (vs. photoshopped band photos) drives commercial success; Dirty Donnie's Metallica artwork set a precedent; new Metallica expected to feature similar illustrated approach
medium · Kaneda's analysis comparing Metallica and Guns N' Roses illustrated artwork success; predicts new Metallica will follow same approach

Topics

Stern Pinball hardware transition (Spike 2 to Spike 3)primaryNew Metallica pinball machine announcement/rumorprimaryAmerican Pinball's next title and commercial strugglessecondaryPinball game design and illustrated artwork qualitysecondaryCurrent Stern releases (Jaws, Elton John) market performancesecondaryPinball content creator awards and community engagement (Twippies)mentionedStern market saturation and game launch strategysecondary

Sentiment

mixed(0.45)— Kaneda is excited about the breaking news and exclusive scoop but expresses skepticism about the wisdom of releasing a new Metallica when the original is already excellent. He is critical of American Pinball's commercial performance and dismissive of the Twippies awards' declining relevance. His tone is bombastic and self-promotional mixed with genuine industry concern about Stern's market challenges.

Transcript

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Some people call me Maurice Sera, sera, sera, sera, sera, sera, sera Welcome everybody, happy Sunday, it is Super Bowl Sunday, this is Kaneda's Pinball Podcast and I'm gonna do what I do best. I'm gonna give you breaking exclusive news on something about to happen at Stern Pinball. You didn't hear this anywhere else. This has been a little bit of a rumor floating around but I've got more details, more specifics. But first I want to thank each and every one of you for not voting in this year's Twippies. Did you see the numbers? I didn't really talk about it much after it happened last week, but let me just put it like this. The top 13 content creators combined only got 477 votes combined. Cary Hardy won the category with just 96 votes and he made an acceptance speech with 96 votes and I think direct messaging Cary jabbing him. I mean come on at what point are we gonna get some pride people and not make acceptance speeches with just 96 votes? Just to put things in context Kaneda got 664 first place votes last year. So you tell me everybody did all that pinball positivity A new activity workout for Colin and Will and all those other content creators that slammed me for months destroyed this award show and this is what we're left with. Anyway, if they ever want to get the Twippies back on track, they're going to have to make Kaneda eligible. I really do feel bad for Jack Danger. He should have been up on stage in Texas having everybody clap and celebrate his inaugural game Foo Fighters which was a tremendous pinball launch last year. Alright so what going on Chris What the news Nobody cares about the twippies they dead Tell us the Stern news Now before I get to it we also getting some breaking news from Naps ArcadeJason love you brother and he said that American Pinball might be bringing its next title to Texas Pinball Festival Well of course they are It been a year since Galactic Tank Force tanked Nobody ordering that game and we all know they gonna march into Texas with their Barry O Food Truck Barbecue-inspired dead-on-arrival game and I hear it might be a single level game. I'm not sure if that's gonna be true or not. Will it have any of those fancy schmancy Deeproot mechanisms that were in that FoodTruck game? I'm not sure there was like a soda fountain thing where those were like the targets and I don't know what's going on with American pinball, but I can tell you right now after you hear this news, it's gonna get even harder to sell a Berrio game. All right, Kaneda shut up. Kaneda stop talking. What's the big breaking news? Okay, everybody. Are you ready? I have from one of my best sources in all of pinball. This guy's never been wrong. He is telling me the following. I'm gonna deliver it as a rumor, but man, this sounds like it's gonna happen. I am hearing Stern Pinball is about to transition from Spike 2 to Spike 3. Now, it's not just better LCD imagery, you're also gonna get more computing power. Stern Pinball needs this, right? They don't have enough power to like light up their games with modern lighting. I think that's one of the reasons why we're not seeing a lot more I'm not done. What I'm also hearing is this. This is not a remake of the old Metallica game by John Borg and Donny Gillies (Dirty Donny) and Lyman Sheets. This is going to be a brand new spanking metallica machine with an all new design, an all new layout, all new code, all new animations, all new this, all new that. And so you are hearing it here first on Kaneda Pinball Podcast that a new metallica game is gonna come out sometime soon Maybe it the next title or the title after the next game If you a betting man I would bet this is the next game because Stern usually gets out a music pin a year and I don think Jack Danger gonna do another music pin and John Borg did the original Metallica so maybe he doing this new version of the game and so this raises a lot of questions right Who's doing the art package? Who's designing the game? How much is this game gonna cost? Well that's the only thing we know. It's gonna be expensive. All these Stern machines are expensive and they weigh a hundred pounds less than Jersey Jack machines. They need to just put some dumbbells inside those games to make them feel as solid. So when I heard this news and I'm like another Metallica which is crazy right? There's already out in the world somewhere close to five to six thousand I didn't know that the game was going to be released in Metallica machines when they made the game like over 10 years ago. And my first thought was if Stern releases a new Metallica, and you know they've got to do illustrated artwork. I don't want to see the old band members up there with Photoshop. Nobody does. Like Guns N' Roses was done right. They illustrated the band in skeleton format. So I think we're going to see something similar the way we saw the Donny Gillies (Dirty Donny) artwork. So we're gonna get this new game out there and then I was like well what happens to all of those old Metallica machines? Now maybe you're happy because it's a new version of Metallica, right? I think for people who own an existing Metallica, what would have been more painful if they re-released the game you have with like new LCD screen stuff and new art packages, that would have made all of your games less desirable. So now that this is a totally new game maybe this makes some of those Metallica owners feel better Maybe you going to own two Metallicas Does anybody want two Metallicas in their lineup Well yeah if you a diehard Metallica fan I know Guns N Roses fans who have both the Data East game and the Jersey Jack game But man oh man oh man right In a world in which we want more original stuff we haven seen before to go back to an older theme we already had And not just that we have a great version of a Metallica pinball machine that is one of Stern best games ever It is one of Lyman best games ever It is one of John Borg best games ever And it is actually the pin that really showed Stern Pinball If you do illustrated artwork you can have a ton of success More Metallica's coming. Jaws Pinball, is it gonna keep selling well over the next few months? Elton John is out there. It's not selling very well. There's a lot happening in pinball. And I really do believe this. Stern Pinball is gonna have the most difficult time with the size of the company. They need to make sure every launch they come out with has like thousands of people ready to absorb all of these games. And so we shall see more on this. and I think this is going to be the game after Jaws, a new Metallica. This is just going to be a short breaking news edition of Kaneda's Pinball Podcast. I will be back this week with more shows, more to talk about, but now you can run to Pinside. Let everybody know that Kaneda has informed you. There is a new Metallica coming, new design, it's a Spike 3 system launch title. Alright, just make sure when all the crybabies on Pinside who don't want to ever give me credit Thank you for giving you these scoops that nobody else is giving you that it's spelled K-A-N-E-D-A. Happy Sunday everybody. Let's go Niners. I'm going to root for the Niners. I just want to see Taylor Swift lose something this year. Later. 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