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Pinball Junk Drawer Episode 71 - Kong Media Day Wrap up and Brewery Kiddie Funland?

Poor Man's Pinball Podcast·podcast_episode·35m 14s·analyzed·Apr 24, 2025
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Analysis

claude-haiku-4-5-20251001 · $0.028

TL;DR

Stern media day recap: Kong impressions, factory tour, industry figures, and brewery PTA chaos.

Summary

Paul Gordon-Langford and Craft Brew Sally discuss their experience at a Stern Pinball media day event in Elk Grove Village, Illinois, where they toured the factory, met industry figures like Dwight Sullivan and Gary Stern, and played the upcoming Kong machine. They also recount an awkward brewery visit where a parent-teacher association meeting turned into chaotic kids damaging pinball machines.

Key Claims

  • Kong has multiple innovative shots including a spiral kickback and sweeping targets that can be hit in one motion

    high confidence · Craft Brew Sally describing gameplay experience at media day event

  • Kong's licensing challenges may prevent cross-promotion or game unlocks with Godzilla due to Toho's restrictive licensing

    high confidence · Paul and Sally discussing licensing conversation at Stern media day

  • Dungeons and Dragons has a co-op mode with variable difficulty where the first player faces hard rules and subsequent players face easy rules to enable family play

    high confidence · Dwight Sullivan explaining gameplay mechanics to Paul at media day

  • Stern is planning multiple media days with different manufacturers as they received confirmation to visit Spooky for Evil Dead

    high confidence · Paul announcing Spooky media day scheduled for late April

  • Kong's artwork is a collaboration of three different artists including Freres

    medium confidence · Paul recalling Zombie Yeti explanation at media day, admits imperfect note-taking

Notable Quotes

  • “licensing doesn't affect the build of materials...the licensing has to affect the cost of a machine, but not the way they were describing it”

    Paul Gordon-Langford @ mid-content — Confusion about licensing cost structure and transparency at Stern

  • “I really dug the machine. I did ask if you put Kong aside of Godzilla if they would fight or if they would unlock things. And they said they hope to, but they're not saying no, but it comes down to licensing.”

    Paul Gordon-Langford @ mid-content — Reveals potential cross-promotion plans between Kong and Godzilla dependent on licensing

  • “every couple of weeks, it gets to be Chuck E. Cheese in here”

    [name withheld pending review] @ late-content — Reveals Parent-Teacher Association meetings at brewery include children and machines

  • “I'd love to see your flowcharts”

    Dwight Sullivan @ mid-content — Shows technical engagement between industry veteran and fan community

  • “We never envisioned being invited to something like this...we held the people the teams that make all this stuff I held them in such high regard that it was like such an honor”

    Paul Gordon-Langford @ mid-content — Reflects community reverence for manufacturer access and the significance of media day invitations

Entities

Paul Gordon-LangfordpersonCraft Brew SallypersonDwight SullivanpersonGary SternpersonKyle SpiteripersonZombie YetipersonElwynnpersonFrerespersonColinperson

Signals

  • ?

    event_signal: Stern hosted successful media day event with structured factory tours, game demonstrations, and executive engagement; positive reception from attendees

    high · Paul and Sally extensively described positive experience with factory tour access, behind-the-scenes gameplay, multiple executive meetings, and meals provided

  • ?

    product_launch: Kong is officially announced and demonstrated at media day, with complete gameplay revealed to media

    high · Detailed descriptions of Kong's mechanics, artwork, theme, and gameplay features; public domain IP status confirmed

  • ?

    gameplay_signal: Kong features multiple innovative shot types including spiral kickback mechanic and sweeping target shots that appear to be novel mechanical implementations

    high · Craft Brew Sally detailed spiral mechanism connecting to kickback and sweeping targets; noted these as differentiated from other Stern games

  • ?

    licensing_signal: Cross-game functionality between Kong and Godzilla pinball machines likely blocked by licensing restrictions from Toho, despite mutual interest from Stern

    high · Paul asked about Kong/Godzilla cross-promotion; Stern indicated interest but 'comes down to licensing'; Paul speculates Toho's restrictive licensing is the holdup

  • ?

    design_philosophy: Dungeons and Dragons intentionally designed with variable difficulty co-op mode to enable multi-generational family play with parents and children

    high · Dwight Sullivan explained first player gets hard rules, subsequent players get easy rules to prevent long gameplay blocking kids from taking turns

Transcript

groq_whisper · $0.106

0:00
Now who's responsible for this unwarranted attack on my person? I say, I say, I say, pay attention now, boy. This is, of course, Foghorn Leghorn presents the Pinball Junk Drawer. You all asked for it. I say, you all asked for it now. You're gonna get it. Boy, oh boy, are you gonna get it. Go, I say, go away, boy, you're bothering me. Ooh, in the blink of an eye, we're back from our whirlwind tour of Oak Grove Village. And this is, of course, the pinball junk drawer. My name is Paul Gordon-Langford. With me, as always, Craft Bruce Alley. That's right. We're back from our Media Day event at Stern. We have a new Media Day event planned that we'll tell you all about. And other shenanigans.
0:50
So what did you think of the trip? crafter sally it was it was very exciting and very like overwhelming a little bit overwhelming because yeah i'm i'm not used to this whole like people knowing who i am that's weird because they know who we are from our voices yes and that is very i don't know i'm not used to it yet it's awesome we're always very humbled and like like wow you know and you kind of think how much am i sharing. I think we're okay. Did I talk about people that I shouldn't have? No, we never do. We're actually very kind. We are.
1:30
Not by design, we just are. We got to meet a whole bunch of people. We met Retro Ralph, which I listened to his stuff just a little bit. It was cool. Jamie Burchill, previously from Wormhole, now from his new endeavor. Got to meet him. Very cool dude. I wish I could have. We should have hung out with him a little bit more. Yes, we should have. I was bummed. I mean, everyone's doing their own thing, so it's not bummed, bummed. But I was like, oh, he is a cool guy. And we met the electric bat, Arcade. Yes. What's the guy's name? Cade? No. Maybe. Maybe it's Cade. I don't know. That sounds right. Sorry, electric bat. You're never going to listen to us anyway, doesn't matter. He's too busy running things and making money and, you know, working for a living. And who else? We got to meet Loser Kid. who had never heard of us, but we gave him a sticker, and he gave us his sticker, so that's cool.
Zachperson
Jamie Burchellperson
Retro Ralphperson
Kevin Lozaperson
Stern Pinballcompany
Spooky Pinballcompany
Konggame
Dungeons and Dragonsgame
Evil Deadgame
Seawitchgame
Godzillagame
Mikerphone Brewingvenue
Pacific Pinball Museumvenue
Pinballs to Pixelsproduct
Tohocompany
  • ?

    personnel_signal: Dwight Sullivan, legendary pinball designer with 40+ year career, appeared at media day and engaged with fan community on technical gameplay topics

    high · Paul encountered Sullivan unexpectedly at pizza dinner; Sullivan identified as having been in industry since 1984 and featured in Bally/Williams history book

  • ?

    community_signal: Podcast hosts recognized and invited to manufacturer media events, indicating growing community influence and acceptance by manufacturers

    high · Paul and Sally reported surprise at being invited and at attendees knowing who they were from podcast voices; described as honored and floored by the opportunity

  • ?

    event_signal: Stern's media day model expanding to other manufacturers with confirmation that Spooky Pinball will host similar media day event in late April

    high · Paul announced Spooky confirmed willingness to host media day tour and Evil Dead gameplay demonstration late April

  • ?

    venue_signal: Microphone Brewery in Elk Grove Village regularly hosts Parent-Teacher Association meetings (every couple weeks) during which children are given money to damage pinball machines unsupervised

    high · Bartender confirmed 'every couple of weeks it gets to be Chuck E. Cheese in here'; Paul and Sally witnessed children destroying machines with $5 bills while parents were distracted

  • ?

    product_concern: Pinball machines at Microphone Brewery receiving significant physical abuse from unsupervised children, with plungers pulled excessively and flipper buttons repeatedly slapped

    high · Paul described child pulling plunger like cigarette machine mechanism, children punching illuminated buttons, three minutes of continuous play without proper ball interaction, repeated flipper button slapping

  • ?

    operational_signal: Brewery operators appear indifferent to machine damage as revenue from $5 bills per game outweighs maintenance costs and impact on machine longevity

    medium · Paul noted operators likely view situation as 'money, money' and machines were 'getting $5 put in at a time' despite half-second ball times and physical damage

  • ?

    manufacturing_signal: Modern pinball machines proven extremely durable under extreme physical abuse conditions, surviving aggressive play from unsupervised children without apparent mechanical failure

    medium · Paul concluded 'pinball machines are tough' and noted his home machines are 'babied' in comparison; observed machines withstanding sustained abuse without breaking

    • 2:24
    Of course, we saw Gary and... Oh, Gary Stern, and of course, right off the bat, who came over to you first of all. I'm so jealous.
    2:33
    Are you talking about Zach? Yes, I am. I was like, my distant stepbrother. Don't worry, Zach. I've watched that movie again. We watch that movie all the time.
    2:49
    Every time I'm feeling down and you need to pick me up, I watch the Roger Short movie. It makes me feel good. It's an inspirational movie. It really is. It is. I think we've probably seen it what? Many times. It doesn't matter. Yeah, it doesn't. So Zach came over to you? Yep. And I was like, that's so cool. Yeah. He is a super great guy. Yes. I'm trying to think. Who else? Well, we'll talk about the.
    3:12
    Don's pinball was there. Yeah, of course, Don. Fox City's. yep Fox City Pinball was there we can talk to those guys I talked to Matt but I don't think he was there with I don't think he was there for Fox City I think he was a plus one but he's always nice he's always at the ladies flips he's the tournament director I don't think I ever met him before but you said I did that happens quite often He's at Lumberjack Johnny's quite a bit. I think he was there when we did that last tournament, and then I think he might have been there on New Year's Eve. I probably didn't notice him because I was in the zone, man. Yeah, that's probably it. The zone of losing. Anyway, I was too busy getting knocked out by fishtails, everyone. Had the worst game recorded in history on fishtails. But that's how you leave a tournament early. Not early. I made it to the finals and then left immediately because of fishtails. But I'm not bitter about it. I think you might be. Just a tad. I wasn't looking for that early exit, but there we are.
    4:22
    But it was really awesome. We got to Chicago the day before. Or not Chicago. Stern. Oak Grove Village. What is it? Elm. Oak. Elm. What is it? Elk Grove Village. Okay, yeah. I'll never get that in the history of my life. So we got to Stern the night before. We got home. It was packed up and left. because they had that 10 a.m. start time. Yes. And we're in Greenville, Appleton, Wisconsin, kind of, Green Bay-ish. And I was like, oh, that's a three-hour drive. That's not accounting for morning traffic. Right. That's us getting up at like 5. I was like, no, I'm not doing that. So we stayed at a place that had free breakfasts, and we did Wednesday night and then Thursday night. What's the best thing about free breakfast? It's free. No. What is it? The waffles. Yeah. They all have that waffle. It must be very cheap to run. Yeah. The waffle. I always have the powdered egg, whatever, concoction, which is always a mistake, but I do.
    5:24
    So we got up, got ready. The whole week before that, I was obsessing about getting sick. I was worried about getting sick. I don't even know why. People weren't even getting sick around me at work. It's just like in my brain, I keep like, oh no.
    5:38
    But I wasn't. I had like a tickle. I felt like my nose was running a little bit. You have that rough spot in the back of your nose. So I was like, oh no, I'm going to get sick. I've been looking forward to this so much. But I didn't. It's fine. It was good. So we got there. Kong. Well, first we were all just milling about. I didn't know a lot of those guys that were there. And I wanted to kind of meet them. But everyone was doing their own thing. And they all had their own little cliques. and I'm not really part of any click so I wasn't there. I didn't get to meet any of the YouTube influencers or whatever.
    6:18
    Oh, and Colin was there. We got to say hey to Colin and I just said, hey, hit me up when you need graphics done and he was like, will do, chief. He didn't say it like that but in my brain I converted it to will do, chief. And then we were split into two segments. Well, first you go in and you have to sign in and, you know, get your little name tag. That created a backlog. Yeah, it did. That was a lot of things to fill out with, a lot of like, I don't know what to put here. Right. But in the, like, foyer, they had two pinball machines there that you could play while you're waiting for it to begin. Two uncanny X-Men. Yeah. But they don't have the volume up on them. Well, because they're on the phone, they're meeting people, they're talking to people. I'm just, it's very weird to play a pinball machine with no sound. It is very off-putting and odd. And I'm like, wow. Yeah. I sure do now appreciate more how much they put into the voice acting and the sounds and the effects. It was very odd. Yeah. That was cool. So then, you know, and you can like look through the glass at that field of awesome pinball machines. And I'm like, I just want to be in there. Can I be in there? And they're like, no. And I said, okay, fine. I think your nose print was on the door. Yes. so then they broke us into two groups and they were like okay one group is going to do the factory tour and then one group is going to meet with the elwyn and um zombie and the seth ceo and there were two other people there i think like programmers head of marketing and uh shoot guy had a new york hat on doesn't matter i mean it matters he's very important he was like the one that secures licensing i think oh yeah programming and licensing and uh so we don't know that yeah that's true i don't know a lot of people said they listened yes the guy that was organizing the tour was like oh i love that one so he is shout out to that guy yes i didn't write his name down should have i even asked him twice so i would remember this thing you know who you are dude thank you so we went through the tour which we've been through the tour before we did an expo this one was a little bit more intimate it was yeah a little more time to to you know take pictures and ask questions and look because at the expo it was literally they were slammed yeah because they had tours just non-stop yeah so that was really cool and a super tool super tall guy you remember his name the tour the guy gave us a tour so we went to the tour and we got to see all and they were showing us all of course the stations and all that kind of stuff which i always like enamored by I love I love touring factories So then we like looking around and then but then on the it was like like, on the rotisseries and on the thing was, of course, Kong. So you got to see underneath the cabinet and the mechs, and all the, like, you got close-ups of those. It was so really, it was so cool. And then you come back out, and you get to play, just go out in the field and play pinball, and they have all the different things, all the different games, of course, that you just go and play and play and play. And they fed us a delicious lunch. And then it was our turn for the meeting Elwynn, and he kind of talked about the different shots on the game. And then Zombie Yeti talked about the artwork, which was a collaboration of like three different artists, which is interesting. Like Freres did some, and he did some, and the third guy, I can't remember. I should have done a lot more note-taking, but I don't do that much. It was awesome. It was neat hearing them talk about the decisions they made. One of the things that was confusing to me, and I guess I didn't think of it this way, is he said that licensing doesn't affect the build of materials, which I know that's build of materials, but you're also like, well, the licensing has to affect the cost of a machine, but not the way they were describing it. It didn't, but it has to kind of come into play, right? You would think so. I think I missed something there. Like in translation, I was like, so, you know, because the Beatles was more expensive because the Beatles is an expensive license. So it wasn't, I think from his perspective, it didn't affect it. But it does affect the final cost or the final pricing maybe. I don't know. Again, don't remember doesn't really matter. Right. So then we got time to play the machines in the most awesome room ever. because all the room that they showed the Kongs on had all the CEs of like, it was the first one off the line of all of them. Like the one of 500 of remastered Metallica, one of 500 Blood Red Kiss Elvira. They had the 30th anniversary of Jurassic Park. Jurassic Park, Jaws. Like it was all the top of the line stuff. So we're just in there playing these incredible games, you know, having a wonderful time and just enjoying all of it. And then when we come out and we eat, when we eat, we meet different people. That's when we talk to Gary again. And the guy that gave us a tour, his name is Kyle Spittieri. There we go. Because he said he was from, oh, my God, he worked at Marco's. He was also at that Pacific Pinball Museum. Yes, yes, Pacific Pinball Museum. He said he learned a lot. They taught him a lot about pinball. So that was really neat. Although it was funny, I think he probably learned he was giving that tour that morning because his shirt had that, I just took this out of a package, the lines. I guarantee he was like, wait, what am I doing today? And they're like, we need someone to do a tour. And he's like, all right, I guess. And they're like, well, you need a shirt. And then somebody ran and got him a shirt and said, does this fit? And he's like, yeah, I guess. That was awesome.
    11:49
    So then we got our time on Kong. Now, the reason why they do media days, what did you think of that machine? I really liked it was there's so many different things on it than other games like the shot, there's so many more shots I like the kickback shot yeah, from the spiral thing it's like a spiral and it hits a kickback so then it comes right back at you, pretty much you get used to it, I like the sweeping targets where supposedly you can hit those in one sweep I couldn't ever do that like so like I kept on trying because I kept on missing the very bottom one like to do the sweet targets and then like the shot would go straight up through yeah and then it revealed Gary Stern behind it in a one of those targets which was just awesome I missed that there's always like little nods yeah no he was in that gold he was that gold thing that you had oh I missed it the gong was really cool yes the subway of course the kong the main feature of the game. It was articulated and really cool.
    13:02
    I liked it all. I thought the artwork was beautiful. Very appropriate for what you're looking at. And the style of the animations where they did that cartoonish I was like, to me, it was the best way to do that. You can't use the old movie. Well, and this is a public access. Public domain. I mean, movie stuff. Yeah, they could have used movie stuff, I think, but they bring it to the modern time. Right. So that's the best way of doing it. It's almost like a cel-shaded look.
    13:36
    Well, not really. It's a different kind of art style, but I dug it. Yeah, it was neat. You didn't like the spider. I did not. I am not a spider person. But you just don't like spiders. Right. I mean, if the spider wasn't on it, the things that were going on under the spider were really neat because it would grab the ball, and sometimes it would hold on to it. Sometimes it just moved it around and flung it out. It was neat. It was. That game is stacked. It has a lot under the glass. It has a lot of shots, interesting shots, too. That's one thing.
    14:13
    I don't know. A lot of the newer Sterns as they're coming out, they have some interesting shots. They're trying to do different stuff. I dig it. I really dug the machine. I did ask if you put Kong aside of Godzilla if they would fight or if they would unlock things. And they said they hope to, but they're not saying no, but it comes down to licensing. And if one half is public domain, I'm pretty sure I know where the licensing holdup might be.
    14:43
    Toho does not hand out Godzilla stuff freely, so we'll see. I have a feeling we're going to get something, though. Yeah, that'd be neat. It would be cool. And, of course, Toho also likes money. And they also like people to remember that Godzilla's awesome. Well, I think we all know that. No, we don't. But one of the biggest things that made me laugh the whole day was, so we get 20 minutes in a room with the machine. Right, Kong. And inside the room, there's a sea witch. Yes. so part of our 20 minutes with king kong you went over and you played sea witch well i like sea i know it just made me laugh i was like hmm i can't you can play sea witch at district 82 anytime you want i thought sea witch looked lonely and i was like you know what it was it was seeing all the attention going to kong and i was like you know what i'm gonna i'm gonna do you a solid sea which you are awesome. So, yeah, I can't not play a machine, I guess. It's weird. I know. I do know that about you because I have seen you in any place that has games, and you play every single one of them if you can. If I can, which is not always possible. So then, you know, we got our time with it, and I really can't say enough. One thing that does come up a lot, and I've heard this a lot, a lot, and it baffles me because I'm so far on the other side. I hear a lot in the podcast stuff, no one cares about Godzilla. I could care less about Godzilla. Really? Like, now Godzilla, I've been Godzilla mania running wild on me since I was a kid. Yeah. I watch them all. I have all the movies. I love them. Am I really that much of an anomaly in America? It might be a different generation. I guess. Do you know what I mean? like who who introduced you to godzilla where did you see godzilla on tv on on television right you know playing it like they play it on saturday morning matinees or whatever i don't know i guess it was just weird like i guess i just thought everyone thought godzilla was cool it's so tokyo like in japan culture it's it's part of japanese culture you know now dungeons and dragons and king kong i don't know how those two are gonna play out like i see them both as being like really solid machines i feel like dungeons and dragons is gonna be is gonna trump the king kong just because of all of the people that are into dungeons and dragons really yeah wow that's i mean there's a lot of people out there that yeah but elwynn is kind of reign supreme his well yeah i mean it is a great game but i mean it it possible which theme like if you are at dungeons and dragons are you going to play are you going to buy both of them No one No you going to buy Dungeons Most people can afford to Right You know Right All these games... No one's... Not many... Well, people are talking about it, I guess. You know, all these games are releasing and hurrying up and releasing because now they had Dune released, at least the teaser. Harry Potter's teasing. Have we seen any other Harry Potter except for the snitch on the plunger rod? Not that I know of at this point. I haven't seen anything.
    18:04
    Overall, it was incredible. Oh, we're sitting down at pizza. That was our dinner. They gave us dinner.
    18:12
    And I come over and there's, somebody had come up and said, can I sit here? And you were like, yeah, whatever. You could tell the person worked there because all of us media people had a little sticker on our chest that said, I'm a media idiot. Don't talk to me or shoo me away if you need to. and you could tell he was haggard because he had worked in the pinball industry for a long time and we're sitting there talking and finally I was like who are you and he goes oh I'm Dwight Sullivan and I almost fell out of my chair because I had just gotten done reading Pinballs to Pixels the Bally Williams history it's this really good book about the history of Bally Williams in the transition period when arcade stuff kind of came in and they were trying to do Duel and then they closed up, you know. And he was one of the guys there. So he's been designing and doing, he's been in the pinball industry since like 89, I think he said. I think he said 84. 84, okay. I think so. So I'm sitting there like, I'm like, like my brain's exploding. And then another guy sat down and he started saying, oh, I like beat machines, but then I also, I take new machines and I do like these elaborate flow charts online and then I'll finish a machine and I get rid of it and get the next one. And he was like, I'd love, and then Dwight Sullivan goes, oh, I saw, I read your stuff online. I think there was a couple of things that we need to adjust on your flowcharts. And he's like, I'd love to see your flowcharts. And what did you say, Krafters?
    19:44
    I think I was like, what is going on here? No, you looked at me like, what the hell is going on here? What is happening here? I don't know. Because he was like, oh, I've never heard that before. and he looked at me and I was like, I'll never ask you for your flowcharts. I don't care.
    19:59
    It was like way over our brains. It was cool. Yeah, it was. And he was a nice guy and he came over and showed us some shots on Dungeons and Dragons. He showed us how to launch the co-op. I remember two shows ago we said somebody showed us how to do co-op and then he walked away and we immediately forgot. We couldn't figure it out. We're so dumb. and then but then dwight sullivan did so now i'll remember always because dwight sullivan showed me how to do that right and he's also like oh you can do this and he's talking about how there's like a there's a mode for the first person has the hard hard rules and then the next three are just super easy so if so that way like what he had said was that way if there's a dad and he has some kids at home he can play with his kids and the kids won't be like oh great dad's gonna be playing for an hour. Right. Because at first when he said that I'm thinking what the hell is that for? I couldn't even envision why that would be a thing but then it was neat. It's one of those things and I knew well I didn't know I hoped it would go how it did because to me this is one of those things that's going to be like a memory of a lifetime. And that sounds I know that might sound dumb but we never envisioned being invited to something like this. Right. And we held the people the teams that make all this stuff I held them in such high regard that it was like such an honor to do this. It really was. And that's how I kind of viewed it. So I was just, I couldn't believe the opportunity we had. Yeah. First of all, I was floored that we were even invited. Yeah. And then for people to actually know of us and listen and stuff like that, I was like, wow, this is crazy. It is so cool. I'll go on record and say I'm pretty sure that Stern's going to do pretty good with Kong. and can't wait for the next one. You know? Right. So before everyone's favorite segment, which is, of course, you know, Crack Through Sally. Are we going to talk about our next media day? Yes, we are. Nice. We just received confirmation. Now, we have off. Before we took these days off, I had put in for like a week, like half a week in the end of April. It was like Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. Just because like that would seem like a good, at the beginning of the year that seemed like a good time to like break up the year. So then I was like, well, then we got this and we had the emergency two days that we had it. So now I'm like, well, I'm going to have this off. So we're going to just do something. So we reached out to Spooky and said, hey, is it cool if we come down that Thursday? And they just wrote back before the show saying, that sounds good. Let us know. so next time you hear from us we will be we will have toured spooky and kind of picked their brains and got to look at Evil Dead which is one of my favorite movies of all time and we're super excited you should wear your Evil Dead shirt when we go do I have an Evil Dead shirt? yeah Brendan and Molly bought it for you gotcha maybe or I might wear my spooky mechanic shirt oh that's true too anyway we were we've always been hopeful that we can get down to Spooky because, you know, everyone's rooting for Spooky. They're from Wisconsin. They're from Wisconsin, and we dig them. So we will be fresh off the heels of a tour, and that will be our next show, I think. Yes. But none of that. Enough of that. That was the teaser. Here's what everyone showed up for. Craft Brew Sally.
    23:33
    Gonna have to put your journal down. Craft Brew Sally Child You've been to all the breweries around You've been running all over the town Tell me what to drink until I fall on the ground Yeah That's right, people.
    24:03
    So before we do this section, quick question for you, Craft Brew. Yes. When your parents were invited for parent-teacher meetings, were they at like a distillery or brewery or maybe like an old crack house down the street? No. Or were they in a... At the school, usually. At the school, okay. With no children around. Hey, why would I be asking that weird, odd question? Well, because while we were in Elk Grove Village, craft brew Sally may have found a brewery. You don't say. I do. Okay. I have like a radar.
    24:44
    You have a phone. That's like a radar. I'm sure there's an app that actually makes it into a radar. It's called Beardar. Yes. I made that up. You did.
    24:54
    So we went to a brewery in Oak Grove Village called Microphone. Yes. And, you know, we walk in and we're like, oh, this place is nice. It's like microphony themed, has some amps on the wall. Fake fronts and signed guitars. Now, in my brain, when you had asked about this, I was like, sure, why not? Because I'm thinking, okay, end of a busy day, kind of a busy two days, you know, the work and the getting driving and getting there. We'll just go chill, have a nice chill night. It's a Thursday. who's going to be sitting at a craft brewery on a Thursday because a lot of times when we go to these breweries there's people there but not there's just a couple people there you have a quiet time, you talk it was nice when we walked in they had like 6 or 8 pinball machines outfitted with the stern army stuff yep so we get a seat and it's kind of busy and Foghorn's like oh let's look over there it looks like there's a room back there well there's a sign on the wall that says um after 5 p.m this room is reserved yeah okay that's all it says you're like sure whatever so we're sitting there at the one table that's like by the line of people ordering their stuff a little cramped yeah but you know we had a couple beers and all of a sudden there like kids yeah i see two kids wander out Mm And they small I don know ages Just they Like, head to pinball machine height. Yeah, they can kind of see over the glass, but not really. And one of them is trying to put a dollar in a machine, and it's not going in, but she's just going from machine to machine trying to feed the dollar in. The smaller one of these takes a $5 bill and shoves it in the front of Dungeons & Dragons, And it goes, boop-a-doop, you have seven credits. And I went, I don't think that's right. And then she just starts punching the button that's illuminated. And I mean punching. She's punching it. And it's just going and going. And I hear it, boop-a-dee, boop-a-dee, boop-a-dee. And I'm like, wow. And I see the other one finally gets the dollar in a different machine, so she's no help. And I look at Krabby's side and I was like, I want to help her so bad, but you can't go up and talk to a kid. I'm not going to go talk to a kid. Like the cops will be called before anyone said, hey, what are you doing with that kid? I'd be like, no. So I resisted that urge. So she hits the plunger and she's just hanging on to the plunger just kind of like. And she's not like pulling the plunger like you would pull a plunger to launch your ball. She's like pulling it out like, like, you know how the old cigarette machines had the plunger you'd pull out and the cigarettes would fall out the bottom? That's a pretty old reference, Crabber Sally. You're showing your age. So she hits the button and it launches. And you know that with all the saves, it's like three minutes that this machine is just getting ravaged without anything happening other than like just a ball relaunches. A ball relaunches. So then finally, apparently, the other girl lost all her balls. And she comes over. She's like, no, there's things on the side. Oh. and they're just slapping the things and slapping the things and i was like just i just took a deep drink okay and then three boys come out of this this magic curtain room yeah and and then they're just like standing there and they're just like slapping slapping slapping slapping the the flipper button and then i noticed i looked over in this and at some point the table beside us became three kids that are too cool for their parents so they're just looking at their phones being all like, oh, I'm so edgy and I have feelings or whatever. They're like, they can't drive so they can't escape, but they're too cool for whatever's happening.
    28:53
    And at this point, one or two parents are standing there and they're just letting the mayhem happen. And I look at Krabby and I was like, what is this? And I said, their children are preoccupied for a few minutes, so they're just standing there with their own thoughts in their head yeah you could stay but i'm leaving and their bodies stayed in their mind drifted into the took the beer and left so and then i walk up at the bartender because at this one i'm like we're done here we're this is this is over this sounds like it was just a few minutes but this was probably like a half hour and it kept on getting louder and dumber and and i'm like those i wanted to grab all those machines and run out of the room with the machines somehow like the Hulk and to save them. But then I go over and I was like, what the hell is with these kids? And I think I literally said that, like, what the hell is with these kids? And the bartender had the best response. He's like, once in a while. No, he said every couple of weeks. Every couple of weeks, it gets to be Chuck E. Cheese in here. What? Parent Teacher Association meeting. At a brewery. Come on. With your kids. With the kids. Like, I thought that was, like, the time where parents and teachers, like, talked about stuff that was important. Yeah. Without the kids, like, there. These are your failings. These are what your children's failings are. Nope. Apparently not in Elk Grove Village. That's where everyone goes and gets hammered and they let their kids take five bucks and wreck machines. Oh. I wanted to have a legal action against. I wanted to get some ambulance-chasing lawyer to bring up some kind of a defamation case against my heart and soul that these people perpetrated on me. But I don't think that's going to go anywhere. It just was like, I didn't even think that was legal. To have a parent-teacher association involve alcohol while children are involved. If you're an Elk Grove Comptroller, or you might be the principal of a local PTA school in Elk Grove Village, hey, would you tighten things up a little bit, buddy? You know what I mean? Like, go to McDonald's. See if that flies. Go in the ball pit and see if that works. I couldn't believe what I was looking at. Now, I mean, from a perspective of the people that own microphone, they're like, hey, money, money. Yeah. Plus, the machines, although they got devastated, they were getting $5 put in at a time. It's just the ball times were like half a second. Auto launch, auto launch. They're just like, hey, I just made a buck for nothing. Right. Other than a kid hanging off of a plunger, and they want a side of it getting slapped like a thousand times. Hey, I did leave there going, man, pinball machines are tough. Yeah.
    31:49
    Ours are babied. No wonder they never break. I'm always like, oh, be gentle. but we did have some beer while we were there and they were pretty good okay so yeah the first one kind of was fitting it was the drunken lullaby it was called it was called popcorn has a headache but then we also had wheat like waves yeah um hey mambo mambo italiano No, that was the one I drank. It was like a Czech lager. It was just a lager. It was a Pilsner. Oh, Pilsner. There you go. And I just had like two or three of those. Yep. And then Sucker for Pain, which was really good. That one was sort of a pina colada. And then I had I Want My IPA. Yeah. I wanted that shirt. The bartender had an I Want My IPA, and it was done up like the old MTV logo. It was really cool. Yeah. But it was a good, I mean. And we took four to go. Yeah. We took what? Hefeweizen. We took that, yeah, that wheat-like waves. Gotcha. It was a Hefeweizen.
    32:56
    I mean, it was a nice brewery. If the situation would have been different, I think we probably would have. Well, we even took an Uber because I'm like, you know what? I'm just going to get hammered. I'm just going to go and enjoy myself and relax. We would have been there probably until, not closing, but probably like 10 or 11 maybe. You know, just hanging out, having some beers and enjoying ourselves. I was really sad because I was like, is there another one closer that we can just Uber to a different one? And there was not. There was not. So there you go. And then we just drove home. And we stopped at the Japanese Super Sender store down there, the Asian Super Store.
    33:34
    Mitsuwa. Yeah, if you're ever there. I think it's more closer to Schaumburg, but kind of near where Expo is. We got a really awesome, slightly expensive shochu, which is kind of mugai shochu, which is basically Japan's version of vodka. Kind of. It's like a clear spirit. It's so good. Yeah, it's really good. So, anything else before we head out of here? We did have a wonderful time. We do thank, if you are, anyone listening at Stern, thank you for inviting the media in and letting everyone be part of this. Thank you for inviting us. Yeah, thank you for inviting us. It's awesome. We're very honored, and a little bit of goodwill will definitely go a long way, although we were kind of stern shills anyway. I don't think any gains on that front, but whatever. It was really awesome that we got invited. Yeah. And next time we'll talk all about Spooky and the awesomeness down there. Yes. I can't wait. We'll have another brewery to talk about too, I'm sure. Yeah, if something tells me you're right. Thanks for listening. As always, if you want any sticker, send us an email with your address, and we will, for no charge, put one of our gigantic, sparkly, awesome stickers into the mail for you. And I'd be glad you did. Two things to always remember. One, this is, of course, the podcast for your ears and your butt. And two, Shazbot, nanu nanu.
    35:04
    That's it, man. Game over, man. Game over. Bye.