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Episode 24: Dad Jokes and Pinball

Poor Man's Pinball Podcast·podcast_episode·analyzed·Sep 3, 2019
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claude-haiku-4-5-20251001 · $0.031

TL;DR

Poor Man's Pinball discusses personal collections and underrated games with dad jokes.

Summary

Poor Man's Pinball Podcast episode 24 features hosts Drew and Scott Ian discussing personal pinball acquisitions, LED modifications, and their "Bottom 200" list of underrated pinball games not in the Pinside top 100. The episode is structured around interspersed dad jokes delivered on a random timer, with minimal coverage of industry news by design.

Key Claims

  • Drew completed an LED upgrade on Bram Stoker's Dracula, which previously had all incandescent lighting

    high confidence · Drew speaking directly about his LED project on his own machine

  • Drew is receiving Laser Quest (Laser Q), his first solid state game, which will arrive the next day

    high confidence · Drew stating 'Tomorrow I have Laser Q coming, finally'

  • Scott Ian has a Monster Bash for sale and is planning to give it to Jerome to handle the sale while he plays it to achieve Grand Champion status

    high confidence · Scott Ian: 'I'm gonna do something new i'm gonna actually give my monster bash to Jerome just gonna have him deal with it'

  • Someone from Colorado has a Walking Dead Premium Edition available for potential shipping to the hosts

    medium confidence · Reference to 'that guy out in what Colorado that wants to ship over a Walking Dead Walking Dead Premium Edition'

  • Road Kings was produced in 1986, with approximately 5,000 units made, and sells for under $1,000

    medium confidence · Scott Ian providing game details: 'It's made in 86 About 5,000 were produced It's under $1,000'

  • Keith Elwin scored approximately 3.9 million on Barnyard and dominates top tournament results for that game

    medium confidence · Drew: 'Keith Elwin, like, I think 3.9 million, and everyone was like, oh, my God'

  • Shane Black Axl Rose had production of approximately 3,000 units before production shifted to Adams Family

    medium confidence · Scott Ian: 'I think they gave up after, like, 300. 3,000. Oh, they made that many? Yeah, they made 3,000.'

  • Brendon Small created a custom tower sculpture for Alice Cooper pinball and inscribed the first one for Drew

    high confidence · Drew: 'he inscribed with, um, I think it's one of those like, uh, Cameron Silver sharpening markers... i have the number one sculpt of this'

Notable Quotes

  • “The only pinball podcast that swears and drinks and is unlicensed.”

    Jon (host) @ opening — Establishes the show's irreverent brand identity

  • “You know, I love it that we know nothing about pinball, and we're just getting back to entertaining the masses.”

    Scott Ian @ early episode — Self-aware acknowledgment of the show's entertainment-first approach over expertise

  • “We don't conform to the pinball Mafia rules. We're like the fat guy running the 5K. We're way, way, way in back.”

    Drew @ mid-episode — Describes the show's outsider positioning relative to mainstream pinball media

  • “It's intimate, man. It's intimate knowledge of that machine.”

    Scott Ian @ discussing LED mods — Reflects on the learning experience of internal machine modifications

  • “I'm a limited, my man. You're limited.”

    Drew @ discussing Brendon Small mod — Wordplay on owning an exclusive limited edition custom mod as a 'poor man'

  • “There are two players that play that game, the ones that are the top 2% in the world, and then everyone else.”

    Scott Ian (about Barnyard) @ top 5 discussion — Describes the extreme difficulty disparity in Barnyard tournament play

  • “The shaker motor should always be turned off... Be courteous to your neighbors.”

    Scott Ian (about Last Action Hero) @ top 5 discussion — Practical advice on maintaining machines considerate of others

  • “You just want to play these games. I do.”

    Drew to Scott Ian @ mid-episode — Humorous acknowledgment of Drew's desire for Scott Ian to own more games to play

  • “I'm not a huge Demolition Man fan... No, the pinball.”

    Scott Ian — Clarifies he doesn't personally love the Demolition Man pinball despite ranking it highly

Entities

DrewpersonScott IanpersonJonpersonBrendon SmallpersonJeromepersonKeith ElwinpersonBill WebbpersonEric Ripkeperson

Signals

  • ?

    community_signal: Hosts emphasizing personal machine enjoyment and collection building over competitive play; focus on entertaining casual players rather than tournament content

    high · Scott Ian: 'You know, I love it that we know nothing about pinball, and we're just getting back to entertaining the masses' and general focus on personal collection updates

  • ~

    sentiment_shift: Sentiment shift toward appreciation of underrated classic games outside top 100; players discovering deeper enjoyment in older/less popular titles through extended play

    medium · Scott Ian re-evaluating Adams Family and Pat Lawlor games after increased play time; growing appreciation for Demolition Man despite initial skepticism

  • ?

    community_signal: Evidence of strong community cooperation on technical mods; Brendon Small's custom Alice Cooper tower sculpture distributed through community channels and accepted by Spooky Pinball for review

    high · Drew detailing Brendon Small's custom tower creation, inscription, and distribution to Spooky Pinball; community learning through Pinside forums

  • ?

    competitive_signal: Barnyard identified as extremely difficult with extreme skill gap between top 2% and average players; only elite tournament players achieve 1M+ scores regularly

    medium · Scott Ian: 'There are two players that play that game, the ones that are the top 2% in the world, and then everyone else' and reference to Keith Elwin's 3.9M score as exceptional

  • ?

    content_signal: Poor Man's Pinball deliberately avoiding coverage of industry-wide hot topics (clear coat issues) to differentiate from mainstream pinball media and create entertainment-focused content

Transcript

groq_whisper · $0.143

0:00
Hey guys, flapping your flippers, waxing your balls, Poor Man's Pinball Podcast is what you're tuning into with Drew and Eve.
0:30
Welcome to the Poor Man's Pinball Podcast, episode number 24. That's right, we are a full case of episodes. The only pinball podcast that swears and drinks and is unlicensed.
0:48
Again. Here we are. I just want to say happy Labor Day to all the moms out there. We appreciate you and all that you do.
1:01
Yeah, thank you Labor Day, moms. Well, with us today is Drew and Ian. If you haven't figured that out by now. If you've been living under a rock for the past 23 episodes, it is Drew and Ian. Hey, it's us.
1:16
How are you doing today, buddy? Well, I'm doing all right, Drew. How are you doing? I'm doing good. What are you drinking today? Oh, we caught each other.
1:25
What are you drinking today, Ian? We're doing Chewbacca and Red Bull. He's got a yellow can of Red Bull. Yellow. Ooh, tropical. Tropical?
1:37

The hosts intentionally avoided discussing clear coat issues on this episode to give industry hot topics a break

high confidence · Drew: 'We are pinball not even going to mention the word clear coat today'

  • The hosts are planning season two content and format changes after their one-year anniversary

    high confidence · Scott Ian discussing season two launch timeline tied to show anniversary

    • @ top 5 discussion - number 1

  • “Sinking a lot of ships sucks. It is, but if you... It's exciting when you do it.”

    Drew and Scott Ian (about Shane Black Axl Rose) @ top 5 discussion - number 1 — Dialogue about the challenge vs. reward dynamic of difficult game modes

    • Ryan Kuiper
    person
    Steve Ritchieperson
    Mark Ritchieperson
    Pat Lawlorperson
    Poor Man's Pinball Podcastorganization
    Comet Pinballcompany
    Spooky Pinballcompany
    Bram Stoker's Draculagame
    Laser Questgame
    Monster Bashgame
    Last Action Herogame
    Guns N' Rosesgame
    Road Kingsgame
    Barnyardgame
    Baywatchgame
    High Roller Casinogame

    high · Drew: 'We are pinball not even going to mention the word clear coat today... Everyone else has been talking about because it's just, yeah. We are pinball not even going to talk about the stuff that everyone else has been talking about'

  • ?

    design_philosophy: Shane Black Axl Rose game design limited to 3,000 units due to production constraints and need to pivot to Adams Family manufacturing; production priority affected release numbers

    medium · Scott Ian: 'The production of Shane Black Axl Rose, because they needed to get out fucking 20,000 Adam's Families'

  • $

    market_signal: Used/vintage pinball market remains active with multiple machines available for purchase and trading; pricing varies significantly by model (Road Kings under $1,000 vs Walking Dead Premium negotiation)

    high · Multiple machine acquisitions discussed: Laser Quest incoming, Monster Bash for sale, Walking Dead Premium potential purchase, Road Kings $800-900 range

  • ?

    community_signal: First-time LED modifier (Drew) learning machine internals through hands-on practice and community resources; discovering technical knowledge through repair and modification work

    high · Drew describing LED upgrade process: 'I had to take apart quite a bit of the lower play field... I'm learning through YouTube... talking to people on Pinside. It's actually very cool'

  • ?

    product_concern: Ongoing shaker motor noise issues on Last Action Hero requiring operator discretion; potential neighbor relations problem

    medium · Scott Ian: 'Just for your lovers or roommates or even neighbors or people that might live a mile away... Any of those people will probably hear that shaker coming. So turn that fucker off.'

  • ?

    technology_signal: Drew's LED upgrade of Bram Stoker's Dracula represents adoption of LED retrofitting as standard practice; learning curve through YouTube and community resources

    high · Drew detailed LED upgrade process, sourcing from Comet Pinball, learning through YouTube and Pinside forums

    • Tastes like Red Bull. Tastes like the tropics? No. No, it tastes like tropical piss, Red Bull. Got it. So that's the good kind. Good kind. How about you, man? I'm trying something new today. I'm drinking some Tennessee Honey Whiskey and LaCroix. Do you hear that, Orby? Wait, you're mixing Tennessee? Dude, that's supposed to be... It's Jack. It's sipping Jack. It's Jack Daniels, really. It's a sipping Jack. Is there such thing as a sipping Jack? That's a sipping Jack. I've been slugging Jack my whole life.
    2:06
    Well, I mixed it with some LaCroix, and I'm loving it. All right. If it makes you feel better, I was sipping it for a while before I mixed the LaCroix in there. I got you, brother. I got you. It's good. It's all good. Hey, I'm expanding my horizons because Kessler's didn't get back to us with their sponsorship. I'm giving Kessler's a break for a little bit. Yeah. We're a little butthurt about that, Kessler's.
    2:26
    Was it Beam Suntory? Right? Whatever. Yeah, someone corrected us on Pinside. He was so mad at me. Oh, I know. He's like, oh, you guys can't even get it right. We're like, Sunbeam, whatever. Does anyone know the name of the company that makes Jim Beam? They call it Jim Beam. I don't know. Yeah, no, I'm okay with not knowing. Yeah, whatever. I'm strangely, maybe that's why we didn't get our sponsorship.
    2:51
    Hey, Sunbeam, why don't you sponsor us, motherfucker? So I'm branching out. So now I'm going to say, hey, Jack Daniels, you want to sponsor us? Oh, hey. Jack Daniels, the Tennessee honey whiskey tastes so good. So good. Is that even a good tagline? I don't know. Whatever. What was our Kessler tagline? Oh, shit. What was that? It was good, too. Like, makes the hangover go away?
    3:14
    We're going to have to look that up. I think, what was that? Two episodes ago. So if you guys want to hear it, check out episode 21.
    3:22
    And we had some good Kessler taglines in there. That's so stupid. Oh, my God. Hey, today's dad joke episode. What does that mean, Ian? Dad joke episode.
    3:33
    What does that mean? That means we have a random timer generator that I'm going to start right now, and whenever it goes off, one of us has to just read a dad joke. Sound good? I love it. Who goes first? You can go first. Okay. You know, I love it that we know nothing about pinball, and we're just getting back to entertaining the masses. So if you guys are here listening for pinball news, you're in the wrong place. You know, the thing with the pinball news is it's been beaten to death. You know what I'm saying? We are not even going to mention the word clear coat today. Nope, nope. We won't do it anymore. Nope. We'll call it something else.
    4:13
    Schmier coat. That's not dad joke number one. We'll get there. This booze needs to kick in faster, people. But anyway, no, I mean, we'll talk some good pinball today, But we're not going to talk about the stuff that everyone else has been talking about because it's just, yeah. We're going to give it a break. We just need to give it a break. So let's start the timer, my man. All right. So, Drew, what do you want to talk about today? Oh, the timer's already up. Drew, why don't you give us our first dad joke? My daughter asks, what's a light year? It's like a regular year, but lower in calories.
    4:45
    But I'm bummed. Love it. That's how this episode is going to be, guys. So if you don't like it, turn it off right now because this is going to happen for the next 40 minutes or so. Exactly.
    5:02
    Okay. So what we're talking about today, we have Poor Man's Pinball Podcast Personal Pinball News. Woo! That's a lot. Can you say that one? I'm going to say it one more time. Poor Man's Pinball Podcast Personal Pinball News. Interesting. I like it, man. I'm not going to say it multiple times. No. No, not going to happen. But here's what we got going on. Drew, as always, buying machines. And everyone's like, Drew's not a poor man anymore. Well, since I bought his machines, Drew is a poor man officially. But I did my first LED job.
    5:35
    Really? Yep. My Bram Stoker's Dracula had all incandescence. And I was like, huh, that's not going to work. So I went to Comet Pinball. Maybe a new sponsor? No. So I went to Comic Pinball and ordered a bunch of LEDs. Too soon, Drew. Too soon.
    5:54
    That wound's getting salt rubbed right into it. We love you, Jeff. Nobody but him knows what we're talking about.
    6:06
    So I ordered a bunch of LEDs, and I had some fun with it. I had to take apart quite a bit of the lower play field. It was kind of fun. I like tinkering with stuff, and I've really enjoyed working on my last Action Hero. And then since then, I've had newer games, so this is kind of cool to kind of get back. And I had some lamp socket issues, so I ordered some lamp sockets. I'm going to do some soldering. I got all kinds of stuff going on. But anyways, it looks great. I got 90% done. I said I had to order a couple of lamp sockets because I need to re-solder some cold solder joints. See, I sound like I know what I'm talking about. I'm learning, though. I'm going to YouTube. I'm learning. I'm talking to people on Pinside. It's actually very cool. Shit's sexy, man. No, it's just been fun. Tomorrow I have Laser Q coming, finally. Ooh. Yep. I'm excited. My first solid state game. Buff dudes playing laser pool. Kind of nice. Buff half-naked guys. Get it right. Even better. That's right up your alley, brother. Playing space pool. Yes. Yes, it's the best thing. So it's my first solid state game, so I'm excited about that. And this one's clean and already kind of like LED and ready to go. So this guy knows what he's doing, took really good care of it. That's your LED Bram Stoker's Dracula. Stoker. We're not stroking Dracula yet.
    7:31
    LEDs, man, that's like one of the fastest way to get a novice familiar with pinball. Yeah. My first pinball, Black Rose, I tore into that fucker to get it LED'd, and you learn quite a bit about that machine. It's intimate, man. It's intimate knowledge of that machine. It is. And I just thought, you know, I haven't seen too many before and after pictures, and what I've noticed is all the stuff you look at online, those pictures and videos don't do it justice. when you have it in front of you and you get rid of the incandescence and you throw those leds in there and you see it in person it is so freaking cool so all right we gotta do a joke i will do one here we go uh what is the best thing about dating a homeless woman i don't know ian what is the best thing you can drop her off anywhere dad joke number two i love it i love it um so yeah and then uh like i said i'm learning about the lamp boards and doing some stuff and i'm excited about that um i do want a shout out so i put one small mod on my alice cooper i'm i'm no longer like in the mod business i'm not i'm not doing tons of mods to my game because i've been rotating them quickly um they're very expensive um i'm being i'm being a little more picky about it so i can save some money but anyways this um dna man on pinside his real name is daryl he sculpted a second tower for alice cooper because there's the tower on the left yeah and then on the right where the flipper is there's no tower where there would be like another you know castle tower so he's he sculpted one and lo and behold this thing looks exactly like it belongs on the game. It's so cool. He even, he sent one to spooky, but here's the coolest thing. He, uh, him and I were talking as he was making his prototype for his game. Yeah. And he's like, oh, if, if, if you like it, you know, I'll send you pictures and then you, you know, you can purchase it. I said, that's awesome. And he sent it to me. And on the inside, he inscribed with, um, I think it's one of those like, uh, silver sharpening markers, DNA man, number one so i have the number one sculpt of this i'm very excited about that very cool so i'm the first one to to get this on my game other than him and uh he sent one to spooky to see you know they maybe were interested and uh you know a couple other people now but uh i'm really excited so dna man on uh pin side thank you much man it looks great it's on my brother and and it's awesome i officially have something that's limited edition that i could afford That's what's best for the poor man. You're limited, my man. You're limited. I love it. So anyways, LaserQ is coming home tomorrow. What is it about the solid state that gets you excited?
    10:28
    I love spinners and drop targets. And solid states are known for spinners and drop targets, like most of them. Right. Those cool old sounds. Yep. The sounds in those machines are just, that's pinball to me. Sure. and I've said this before and people in the hobby know about this but they had speech but in this game they didn't use any speech which is fine and it's just a cool game with those cool 80 sounds I think it was 84 so it's just a cool thing to add a collection it wasn't very expensive and I can't have 4 or 5 $7,000 machines in my house let's see well not right now they'll probably come i'll have 10 you know in no time because they they seem to be multiplying so they're having pinball babies i keep telling my pinball machines to quit procreating but i can't help it man you can't and uh ian's got his monster bash still up for sale he got a few nibbles but uh you want to talk about that not really no no still selling it though right yeah i'm gonna do something new i'm gonna actually give my monster bash to jerome just gonna have him deal with it i don't care i dig it he told me that he was serious he's like i'll just i'll dump it off at your house you can play it because i want to get some more time on it i want to get grand champion on it and then uh i try to sell it for him so if anyone looking for a monster Bash remake for just hit me up We got that guy out in what Colorado that wants to ship over a Walking Dead Premium, yeah. We're talking about that, too. Drew and I have to decide. That one, that's intriguing. Well, like I said, for my own selfish reasons, because I really want to play some Walking Dead. I'd be okay with that if you did that. You'd have to arrange all the shipping and ship. Oh, man, now I've got to do some ship? Okay. Yeah, I know it, brother. Well, Paul, I might be emailing you tomorrow and telling you, set it all up and let me know the logistics because I want a Walking Dead. Gotcha. We'll see, though. We'll talk about it. Yeah, I just, you know, it's beautiful. I love the game so much. But it's also, I don't play it as much. I'm ready for something new. Yeah, if you're not playing it, I think that is time, especially in a small collection, to move on to something else. Yeah, no, lots of nibbles. Oh, there's a couple other offers that were pretty badass, but no, nothing that I was really excited about. That's okay. Yep. Guess what? You still have a game that you can play whenever you want. Right. Pinball, baby. That's pinball. That's how it works. So what else you got? You got anything else going on pinball-wise or otherwise? No, no, no. Just trying to get this podcast a little bit more dynamic. So we got a few things in the works. We're playing with some ideas, but look for that probably season two. I think season two will unveil something pretty nice. You know, I told my wife about that, and she goes, season two, what does that mean? And I said, well, it's whenever we want to start it. Because she was just kind of asking me. That would be after our one-year anniversary. Okay, is that what you're calling season two? Season two is after St. Paddy's Day. Oh, man, we've got a ways to go, folks. Yeah, but we've got to dial it in. We've got to dial it in. We do. We have been actually talking about a lot of different things, and we want to bring more entertaining content, and we have some good ideas for that. Yeah, separate us from the pack, right? Yeah, separate us from the pack. Oh, we're well separated from the pack, yeah. We don't conform to the pinball mafia rules. We're like the fat guy running the 5K. We're way, way, way in back. Hey, man, not necessarily. Not necessarily. You saw, what do you call it? That's my boy. That's it. Oh. The big fat guy at the end. Was Vanilla Ice in it? Yeah, the fat guy at the end, though. Adam Sandler won all his money back. Yeah, I remember that. Okay, all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Freaking Donnie over here.
    14:22
    For sure. Again, this whole episode, right? All right, so. Oh, shit. Timer's up, man. Go for it. This one's good. My new girlfriend works with bees. I think she's a keeper.
    14:37
    Oh, son of a bitch. If you like the dad jokes during the episode, please email us at poormanspinball at gmail.com and let us know.
    14:47
    All right. This is cool. I like this. Yeah, every five minutes, you know, we take a break from laughing and talking about shit to telling bad dad jokes. Laughing and talking about shit. It's awesome. Okay. So what have we got next?
    15:03
    Should we do our top five? I got a good game, man. Wow, game. It's a discussion Top five discussion? Yeah, we got some intro music for that I don't know Top five Does that work?
    15:19
    That's it, buddy That is staying in the interwebs forever Drew's top five Second take was pretty good I think we should keep both takes in there I'll interweave them Let us know at poormanspinball.gmail.com Or don't Most people don't Let's play this game Okay so we're going to call it the bottom 200 Are we? I just called it that Alright we'll call it the bottom 200 We didn't have a name No bottom 200 here's how it works It is the top 5 games Personally for each of us That are not in the Pinside top 100 Because everyone talks about those games Those games are great Most of them are fun to play but those games in the 101 to 400 don't get much love okay so we'll give them a little love that's all i just put top five that i would expect to be in the top 100 should should be in the top 100 we went about a little different that means our list might be different that's cool no i like it okay that's what it is okay so top five games that are not in the top 100 I got a lot of pages of dad jokes here Okay go for it So number five Number five is one that I know really well And I think it's a solid game I do have a soft spot for it Last Action Hero It was my first game So I am a little biased But you know It's a cool game It's got Arnold Schwarzenegger It's got some cool call outs Do I think that one belongs in the top 100? Yeah, probably not, but it's my number five game that's not in the top 100. What do you think, Ian?
    17:07
    Last Action Hero is probably one of my favorite Data East games. Oh, there you go. And I love the movie, and I love everything about it. I love the game itself. It shot great. If you can get that crane working good, then you're good to go. The shaker motor should always be turned off. Oh my god, that shaker motor was... Just for your lovers or roommates or even neighbors or people that might live a mile away. Any of those people will probably hear that shaker coming. So turn that fucker off. Be courteous to your neighbors. Other than that, yeah, great game. Very cool. Very cool game. Love that game. What do you got in your number five slot? My number five, I never played. See, I didn't do this very well. That's all right. Hey, it's our show. We're talking about pinball. And my reasoning for having it number five makes no sense either. So I got CSI for number five because you and Eric Pripke talked so highly of it and the unique layout and how cool that is. It was a fun game. The only thing holding back is the fact that it's fucking CSI. Retheme that shit, guys. Whoever has CSI out there, turn that into Nightmare Before Christmas or something. There you go. Anything. It's got a skull in it. I'm trying to think of other skull things. well yeah but that skull they could make it something else to lock the balls miracle on yeah 34th street all right time timer's up uh is it my turn for the show sure is a woman with big breasts works at hooters where does a woman with one leg work i don't know i hop oh the dad jokes keep getting better all right number four number four number four this game is by a classic, classic pinball designer, Mr. Steve Ritchie, F-14 Tomcat. Ooh, a little speed. Yeah, man. I played it for the first time actually recently. That game is fast and fun. And I had an opportunity to buy one a few months ago. I wish I would have now. It's super cool. Great game. It's brutal, super brutal. Anyone who watched the Pembroke Finals with Keith Elwin in there, just dominating that thing was pretty awesome. But very, very cool. Dude, that game is badass. I love that game. The game looks beautiful when it's LED'd properly.
    19:36
    It shoots really great. It's a unique layout. I love the call-outs to that game because it just reminds me of a poor man's top gun if Maverick went up against the communist Russia. I don't know. There are two players that play that game, the ones that are the top 2% in the world, and then everyone else. And everyone else, you know, I see everyone gets scores on there of, like, a couple hundred grand. That's it. Okay. I mean, because Keith Allen got, like, I think 3.9 million, and everyone was like, oh, my God. Like, if you get more than a million in that game, you're just, like, blowing it up. You know, it's just one of those games. But cool game I'd like to own it It's an ass kicker Let me see if you can guess number 4 for me It's designed by Steve Ritchie's brother Mark Ritchie It's my favorite System 11 game It's made in 86 About 5,000 were produced It's under $1,000 We almost bought one at MGC Road Kings Badass game Shoots like a dream I love the artwork. I love the theme. I love how Steve Ritchie does some of the call-outs. Does he? I didn't know that. Oh, that's cool.
    20:57
    Bang for your buck. That's a game. Bang for your buck. Oh, man. Come on, dude. That game's way better than $1,000. $900, $800. That's a great System 11 game. Not enough love out there, so my number four. Awesome. That's good. You know what? I missed that one because I do enjoy that, but good. That's awesome. Way to go. Where are we at? Number three? Number three. This is a Sega large DMD special.
    21:25
    Oh, shit. That might be my number two. Baywatch? Baywatch! And I can only think of two words to describe it.
    21:34
    Cameltoe. I was going to say guard shack. Yours is way more PG. I almost spit on his booze. I only had one opportunity to play this game and I really enjoyed it and it's got a lot to do it's cool I might buy one someday I know Bill Webb talks about his a lot it's cool I don't think it gets enough love either and remember recently it was featured in that last week's Twip in that futuristic house it was like this multi-million dollar house and then it just had it was like a beach house and it had a Baywatch in there and it looked totally out of place in this retro futuristic Jetsons house. I argue it's perfect. Everything else is quirky. Why not have a Baywatch on there? Whatever. So that's cool. I think it's a cool game. I think it needs more love. What did 50 Cent say to his grandmother after she knitted him a sweater?
    22:40
    I don't know. Gee, you knit? that you know what that that's a good one yeah that is awesome oh this is so stupid i love it three right so my number three so we have it at a local bar here it's the only way i was able to play it um but i had a lot of fun with this game it's a stern game It was released in 2001. I think it's a pretty badass game. It has lots of mechs, lots of fun things to do. Is this CSI again? That is High Roller Casino. High Roller Casino with the slot machine, the roulette wheel.
    23:25
    Everything about that game just kind of screams Vegas. I loved it. Needs more love also. I agree. I would like to see one that was kind of decked out and LED'd out and real pretty. Sure. I think that would look pretty damn cool. um but yeah that would be those go for do you have the value on that in front of you 2100 oh that that a steal yeah 2100 yeah if everything working right on it you know it isn it amazing how many games have been made with like cards or gambling Yeah exactly Like a ton of them Pool you know that kind of stuff A couple of those themes. But, no, High Roller's fun. Yeah, High Roller is, you know. Yep. So that would be my number three, Drew. Number three. That's a good number three.
    24:10
    You ready for my number two? Number two, Drew. Go for it, man. Number two. You know this one well. What is it? black rose i didn't have to say anymore black rose here here's why you know once again it's a game you know it's ian's first game you know me being sentimental whatever but that's not why this game um it's fun to shoot and it has a pretty complex rule set it there's a lot of nuances i would say i'd argue it doesn't have a very complex rule set but there's a lot of tricks Yes. Not many people. Yes. A lot of the great players have talked about it. And, you know, Ian and I didn't know half the shit because, yeah, like I said, we're not great players. But just fun. Blowing up the ship is cool.
    24:57
    The way it's laid out is neat. The art can, you know, whatever. I like the art. I don't like the back glass art. Well, so anyway, it's just an all-around underrated game. I mean, that's not really what we're doing, but it doesn't matter because it's all subjective anyways, and we're just having fun. So I'm a black rose, number two. Number two. All right. We got a dad joke here. Ready? I'm ready. Dad joke number five. I don't even know where we're at, but we'll call it number five. All right. Dad joke. What's long, slimy, and smells like pork? Ooh, I can make a non-dad joke answer to that. Go ahead. Come with the frog's finger. is that really a dad joke or is that from the rated r oh man that's a dad joke sorry all right go for it jesus all right no you go for it you're on number two dude oh number two is my baywatch oh okay we talked about it large dmd yeah love the layout it's shot like a dream i like the guard can i ask something sorry i'm gonna interrupt you you know you're selling you're selling this monster bash right yeah and you always you you you said you'd be okay having two pins down here correct right right why don't you buy two of these kind of games i don't want to they're not up for sale very often it's not like i'm going to the store and i'll be like i want one baywatch and one road kings you you could find it shit baywatch and road kings you could you could have another $3,000 left over after that. That would be the best thing. Ian, that would be the best thing for you. Okay, thank you for that, Drew. Sorry. I'm trying to help you and me in the process. I know it, brother. You just want to play these games. I do. But, oh, sorry. So what's your number one?
    26:45
    Ready for this? Number one game. Oh, God, that's so loud. Demolition Man? Demo Man it is. All right, all right. You know, and here's the thing. I'm not a huge Demoman fan. Like the movie? No, the pinball. Okay, you're not a big fan of the pinball. No, the movie's fine. I love the movie. No. I'm going to slap you. And the pinball's fine, too, and I've played quite a bit of it.
    27:11
    I understand why people love it, and I'll certainly play it when I see it. I would never buy one, but I think it's a really cool game. that i'm i'm let me start over i'm really surprised that that one's not in the top 100 for how much love it actually does get yeah if you look at some of the games on the top 100 like how are you still here yes yeah because like like i said i personally wouldn't put in the top 100 right but i know a lot of people that would and and some of the best you know tournament players love it and you know friend ryan kuiper has this beautiful example it's a cool looking game there's so many so much good stuff going on i don't understand how it doesn't get higher right so there you go i get it yeah i get it that's so that's why it's my number one because and here's me mr i love everything and i'm like it's not that great but i totally get why people love it and i think it should be higher much much higher so if terminator 2 is that high yeah it should be right around there yeah because i don't think they're too far off no it's you know it's a very similar yeah it's a simpler game it was from that era what early 90s yeah the looks are the Yeah, it looks very similar. But very cool. You chrome it out. You make it. I mean, you can customize that thing. It's very, very cool. Yeah, no, it's a good game. Good game. Yep. So anyways, that was my number one. Should be higher. My number one is Black Rose. Oh, wow. Ian, we're like brothers. I know what you know. I like Black Rose. I like the look of the game. It was a solid game for me. I didn't have that many issues with it. It was gorgeous once it had those Penn Stadiums. That was a must on that game. It's a dark game otherwise.
    28:58
    The color DMD that Eric Ripke designed or colored was beautiful. And Drew bought for you. Thank you, Drew. Everything about that game is pretty badass. I loved everything, even the call-outs. All the way around. And the music. And it's challenging, though. It's like chopping wood, though. I mean, sinking a lot of ships sucks. It is, but if you... It's exciting when you do it. Yep, yep. You know, it'd be interesting if they kind of, like, redid the whole Top 100, and they just had, like, everyone put in their votes for, like, a few months. You know, I bet you that list would be a little bit different, where, like, games like that might actually make it into the cut. Yeah, I wonder. You know, if you could just... They didn't make a lot of them, though, because that was the same year they made Adam's Family. No, you said that... How many did they make of Black Rose? I think they gave up after, like, 300. 3,000. Oh, they made that many? Yeah, they made 3,000. But back in the day, that wasn't that many. It wasn't a lot, considering they made... That came out in July of 92, and then Adam's Family came right on after that. Oh, that's right. The production of Black Rose, because they needed to get out fucking 20,000 Adam's Families. And can I make a personal correction now that you mentioned Adam's Family? Adam's Family. What do you got? I like Adam's Family. Oh, you like Adam's Family? I have pissed on it. I have shit on it. And now it's time for a dad joke. Dad joke. I don't know if I can top my G unit. Just try. Oh, this one might do it. This one's going to be good. A bear walks into a bar and says, give me a whiskey and cola.
    30:35
    Bartender says, why the big paws? Bear says, I'm not sure. I was born with them. That's bad. but it was read so well by me yes well played that timer again here we go all right um so we're talking about oh and like adam's family yeah i uh well no i never i never liked it i when i first got into pinball it was in the top 10 forever and i played it a couple of times and i was like yeah i don't really get it and now i've gotten more into pat lawler games you know i love dialed in i love wonka and uh i just i i played it quite a bit in a quieter area where i could actually get into it and i see what it's all about and if i have seven eight nine pins maybe it's one of them that's all all right but i don't have seven or eight nine pins so not not now but now maybe someday what is it about it that you like though um the variety of shots okay um the modes gotcha um you know thing i mean the thing i've always liked that's just cool you know how um yeah i was playing with my wife actually and she was like you're playing with your wife's thing yep i was playing with her thing and uh and her cousin it um but i'm pumped and he's cracking himself up i know i'm loving it but But anyway, no, she was amazed by it when Thing came out and grabbed the ball. Is this all getting dirty now? No, no.
    32:17
    No, I just, I think I appreciate it more now. How's that? Gotcha. And I want to spend some more time on it. It's a cool game. I get it. All right. Well, let's do a dad joke. This timer isn't being fast enough for me.
    32:33
    All right. Dad joke number seven. Drew. Yo. What do mermaids wash their fins in? Fin wash or... Don't know. Tide. No! You know, that might beat 50 Cent. No, no, no. Nothing beats 50 Cent. The unit? Come on! Nothing beats that. All right. Well, you just left me. So let's go and start that random timer one more time. One more time. So Adam's family and me, I found, was very funny because Drew and I just recently put two and two together. And we realized that Jurassic Park, the original Data East, has the exact same layout. That's Adam's family. Nobody told me, man. This whole time I'm like, holy shit. You okay, dude? I sunk the ship.
    33:29
    I sunk your battle ship. Ladies and gentlemen, Drew, like, fucking slam dunked an ice cube, a big-ass ice cube in his drink. Went everywhere. It was terrible. Oh, don't worry, Drew. Don't worry.
    33:40
    Anyway, so, yeah, nobody told me about this super secret thing where you can get an Addams Family cheap, just have to buy it in dinosaur form. I was like, who the fuck designed that one where they just clearly ripped off Pat Lawler, you know? But the thing about that was no one's really talked about that. All right. Right? Yeah, I don't know. You know, it's one of those things that it seems like it was common knowledge, but nobody's really talked about it. Yeah, yeah. Really bothers me now that I see it. I can't unsee it. It is tough. You know what we need to ask? We need to ask Mr. Keith Elwin, who doesn't like the Jurassic Park. I don't know if he likes Adam's Family or not. Probably doesn't if it's the same fucking game.
    34:23
    But there are some differences, obviously. I mean, so it is what it is. And, you know, maybe it's just the toys that make it better. I don't know. You know, we're not Keith Elwin caliber players, obviously. No, we're not even Bobby Elwin, his brother Yeah That's locked in a closet Eats pancakes, they slide under the door for him Yeah, we're not even Bobby Not even Bobby No Now we're just making stuff up You know I don't have anything else, Drew It's 3705 We got a few minutes to kill We do, we do Anything else going Anything coming up in this week? I can talk about a few things You ready for this? Go for it Last night, I didn't have to work as long as I thought. I work most weekends. But anyways, so I was like, eh, the wife's in bed. You know, it was after 8. Oh, dad joke. Oh, my turn. Your turn, buddy. You ready for this one, Ian? Yeah, I'm good, man. What do we got? What do two feathers talk about during the night?
    35:21
    Two feathers? Mm-hmm. No idea. It's mostly pillow talk. Oh, man. If you like our dad jokes, email us at poormanspinball at gmail.com. If you don't like our dad jokes, email us at poormanspinball at gmail.com. We may or may not log in this week. It doesn't matter. If you like dad jokes to replace love letters email us at poormanspinball at gmail If you like Drew to be more eloquent when he not drinking email us at poormanspinball at gmail I getting good at this I feel so comfortable behind the mic now Like, I think I've reached, like, a... Oh, what's the word? It's not epiphany. What is that? Prophetic? Oh, you're a prophet now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a fucking prophet? How do you say that? Jesus Christ. Yeah, I can't even say it. Prophetic? See, I can't give that word justice because I can't say it right. No, that's not even the right word.
    36:17
    Prophetic. No, you're not. This is all just going to stay in. Totally. Okay, so you were saying last night you weren't working as much. So I went to one of our local bars that actually maintains their machines. Which bar did you go to? Blackbird. Oh, you went to Blackbird without me? You fuck. Sorry, man. Sunday night, you're coming out with me? Really? Come out with that anytime. I know better. Okay, fair enough. Anytime after 740. Okay, fair enough. So anyways, they usually have six or seven machines there. It's a smaller bar, but they maintain them. Two of them happen to be out of order, which was pretty rare for them. Which two? Funhaus and No Good Gophers. That No Good Gophers they put in a few months ago. Every time I've been there, it's been out of order. It's kind of weird. Yeah. But Funhaus used to work, and it's out of order, but it's fine. But they keep their machines up. um they have dialed in they had the the stern playboy oh wow from the early 2000s yep and then they had medieval madness and the the bad indiana jones yeah the one that's not so great so i had i put five bucks into dialed in and played some really good games and i got the um number three score so you know i'm getting better and uh i had some fun there playboy do you know what the number three score would have been about um 1.5 million yeah 1 million on on dialed in is like a pretty good score okay um grant just to give you guys an idea grand champion was almost 3 million so like three three to five million on on dialed in is like top level like you know people kicking ass um and playboy i'm the playboy champion i have no idea what that means i had a really good score i didn't get on the scoreboard but i got to put my initials in and i'm like oh sweet and then i looked i'm like i'm not on the scoreboard but then it said playboy champion i'm like that's even better than a high score yeah that's something that any man would love to aspire like it had the little playboy bunny icon next to the name right so and the other high scores by the way didn't have that i know it i'm playboy champion hey man congratulations i'm gonna call it i'm playboy champion you are a playboy champion i did it yeah i've seen you in action you're a Playboy champion for sure. Yep. You can do that. You can do it anytime you want, buddy. I totally did it. But that game, the way it plays and even the slings and stuff, it's just so odd. That era of Stern, because that was early 2000s, it was just weird. It's a cool game. It is what it is, but it's just crazy. Timer's up, buddy. I had some fun. I got a joke here for you. What do you got? Did you ever hear of the superhero with a lisp that works out all the time?
    39:15
    Nope. He's Thor. He's so Thor. So you have to email us. Is the Thor joke the best or G-U-Net? So email us at poormanspinball at gmail.com and let us know what you thought. And let us know if we should never do this ever again. But I am having a great time. So this is awesome That was good That was really good Thor He's Thor G-Unit Oh shit Well I have to agree with you about the Playboy game The way the flippers and the slings work Yeah it just feels like Not loose but you know what I mean We have a goal now to get EBW down there Eric from episode 4 To come down there So he can test that out with his wife and see if that's a keeper. Hey, Triona, you want to come here with the kid and we'll look at some naked women. We'll take you to the bar. We'll watch a few naked women in the pinball machine. We'll have a good time. Get the kids some popcorn. Once again, that's one of those machines. If you had a bigger collection, it would be really cool to have. It's a beautiful game, actually. Yeah, it is. It's neat. And then the one thing I never noticed, the pop bumpers. yeah so when you when you complete all the rollovers it says tease and then in the back there's an actual like um curtain that starts lowering every time you do it oh shut up and then there's a naked woman behind it and i was like are you serious i never noticed that before because i was always in these dark places and it's kind of like this black thing and every time you do it it lowers like one inch it's on the back in the back of the playfield it's the no it's uh on the backboard yeah yeah totally totally in back yeah yeah so let me ask you this then yep which backboard do you prefer playboy where they slowly reveal a naked woman sexily that's a word sexily i don't know if that's a word but we'll go with it uh or maybe the black knight uh sword of rage led draw a bridge on fire let's see naked woman or super cool led lamp fire show and folks if you're wondering why we can't get sponsorships this is why pause super cool led fire lamp show sorry black night wins that back thing it does because those those lights are infinitely more cool because the thing is is that this is just a little stupid plastic thing that falls down and there happens to be a naked woman you know what i mean i hear your brother uh dad joke time oh man again is it how long is this episode oh we're at 44 minutes but we're gonna edit about 10 minutes off oh this one's good i'm gonna i'm gonna piss off a small section of our population here Ready? Yep. A midget clairvoyant con man escaped prison. The headline read, small medium at large.
    42:28
    That is the very definition of a dad joke because it's slightly offensive, you know? Yeah. All my dad's jokes are completely offensive. Oh, man. He can't help it. Yeah. That's the only jokes he knows. Yep. They're all against Polish people, which is hilarious because he's German. I mean, it's right next to Poland. Yeah, it is funny. It is funny, though, when he starts getting it and starts rattling them off one after another. You can't help it. My wife's grandfather passed away in his 90s, and this was like 10 years ago. So you can do the math and figure out when he was born. But he had that folksy racism.
    43:10
    The folksy racism? That's the only way I can describe it. It's charming, but racist. And he was this nice guy. I'll just give you the one. Well, first of all, he called Germans kraut heads, which was hilarious. He was part German, too. But he loved baseball. He was one of those guys. He grew up with the radio, and he listened to the radio and the broadcast and loved Euchre and loved listening to the Chicago Cubs and Harry Carey back in the day. Harry Carey. He's a big Chicago fan. Cubs win! Cubs win! He lived here in Milwaukee. Anyways, he would tell us sometimes, he would say, come on in here, look at the TV. And then we're like, what? And he's like, that colored boy sure can run. And we're like, Grandpa, you can't say that. But he was complimenting them. Yes. But the way he did it was like, nope, no, don't do it, don't do it. It was terrible. It was just absolutely terrible. Poor Man Pinball Podcast, don't condone racism. Nope, not at all.
    44:13
    Bad on you, Grandpa. Who is it, Grandpa? Who is it, friend? Yeah, this is my wife's grandfather. Ah, I got you. Yeah, like I said, he would be literally 105 years old right now or something like that.
    44:25
    Yeah, email poormanspinball at gmail.com. Don't send your hate mail here. Yeah, attention, Grandpa. Yeah, send it to Jerry. We'll forward it on to Grandpa. Don't worry. Grandpa, shame on you, sir. To lighten the mood then, we'll do another Jet Dad joke here. what did the pot eat on his birthday? What did the pot eat on his birthday? Oh. Pancakes.
    44:51
    What? Okay. You know, like a kettle pot. Yeah, I get it. I was going to tell you a time travel joke, but you didn't like it.
    45:05
    Let's wrap it up, Drew. With that being said, We ended the show on a slightly racism term and then a couple of dad jokes. I mean, we can't end this any hotter. I was merely relating what somebody else said. I know. I'm joking with you, buddy. I'm joking. All right. Well, we love you out there, everybody. Thank you for listening to this week's Poor Man's Pinball Podcast. Next week, you know what? We might talk more pinball. Hey, I had fun today. Did you have fun today? I got to drink today. I feel like we've been doing this fucking thing in the morning for so long now and in the afternoon. We had a few morning shows and it wasn't great. It was drinking and being stupid. Yes. It's what we do. Yeah. It's what we do. If you have any input on today's show or you want to give us any suggestions, go after yourself. But if you just want to email us and say, hi, poor man's pinball at gmail.com or Facebook, like us on Facebook, poor man's pinball podcast on Facebook. We have quite a few likes now. We're getting more interactive with the fans. every Tuesday Drew sends a nudie on there so it's pretty sexy but yeah that's it that's all I got man how about yourself well if you want to call Ian you can call him at 414 our calling line is closed guys we need one of those call in line yes no you know what because two other guys already have that I'm not doing it but can you imagine the stuff we would get on ours I think it's the same audience I don't think we have a special audience yet prove me wrong special audience and send us an email I don't know I have nothing I was thinking stuff in my head and it wasn't like working with my mouth you know to come out so and that my friends is the podcast well thank you very much everybody again thanks guys I hope you had a good Labor Day weekend and a good week and we will see you next week next week with episode 25 Ooh, the big 2-5. That's a milestone. God bless America. All right. We'll have to get some people on then. We're going to try to get, hopefully, Ryan Kuyper back next week. Yeah, Kuyper will be back next week, I think. All right, well, thanks, everybody, again. Have a great day, and enjoy more pinball. Thanks, guys.
    47:32
    Thank you.